Godly sons not only carry on a family name; they also carry on a family legacy. Godly sons are strong and masculine, yet supportive and mindful. They lead out, yet lean in. Undaunted protectors, yet unending praisers. Uncompromising fulfillers, yet unquestioned fuelers. Godly sons are flawed too, but they funnel others to a forgiving Savior.

I’ve known many godly sons, but when your own sons grow to be godly, it takes on a whole new meaning. A whole new joy. Now that my sons are adults, I too know this joy.

The joy of godly sons

When my sons were young, I’d wonder if they’d grow up, or just grow old? Remember any good things in me, or just blame my quirks? Keep pursuing God when off at college, or fall away like so many of their friends? Bring their mother joy, or pain?

Despite highs and lows, my sons have chosen the former – to grow up, remember the good, pursue God, and bring joy to their mother. My three sons – two biological and one bonus son who married my daughter – have taught me so much about the source of this joy – their godly character.

I’ve learned that godly character is sautéed, not microwaved. It’s crafted with openness, not crammed with opinions. It’s caught and taught, not coerced and trampled. It’s personal and unique, yet built upon one and only one foundation, the one already laid by Jesus Christ (I Cor 3:11). Here are three of the fruits that grow from the roots of godly sons.

3 fruits of godly sons

  1. Standing

Godly sons stand tall by kneeling low. Although unbent by culture and coercion, they bend over backwards to encourage and empathize with those in need. And when they lapse (we all do), their priorities amnesia is only temporary because their integrity is like a fragrant aroma (II Cor 2:15).

For example, as a preteen, my Josh grabbed his little brother and marched home because he would not tolerate a friend’s excessive cursing. A decade later, Josh’s friends praised his character at his wedding rehearsal dinner. Is Josh perfect? No! The boy who would sit on his little brother’s head hasn’t changed much in some ways, but his character glows even when his candle burns at both ends.

  1. Surrendering

Godly sons surrender lower by aiming higher. They lead their families to put God’s will before their own. Self-esteem is high because self-focus is low. While they take a back seat to other people, their humble conviction stays upfront.

For example, I initially wondered if my bonus son Ryan’s humility was an act to impress me. Then I learned it’s an integral part of this man of integrity. Thus, when he sensed God’s leading him to move 1,200 miles to help a church plant, Ryan said yes. No job. No family. No network of friends. Just a calling. So Ryan surrendered. And God blessed.

  1. Serving

Godly sons serve others’ needs more by seeing their own needs less. They go the extra mile, turn the other cheek, and serve when no one is there to watch. Like their Lord, they’re meek (strength through control), not weak. They love people with different color skin because they’re comfortable in their own skin.

So too, Caleb serves others, especially his wife, with excellence. Then again, without being asked, teenager Caleb would clean the kitchen before Mom got home. Although service isn’t Caleb’s spiritual gift, he serves because his character shines at work as much as at home.

I’m not bragging. I’m encouraging you to believe it’s possible when you bear the fruit of the spirit (Gal 5:22-23), starting with joy. If you will, you’ll give your family more than a name, more than strength, more than a role model. You’ll give them the legacy of Proverbs 23:24: “The father of a righteous child has great joy; a man who fathers a wise son rejoices in him.”

Questions: Who in your life has stood, surrendered, and served with excellence? What kind of legacy would your family say you’re passing down? How well does your life bear the fruit of joy?