When bad things happen, we ask, God, why don’t You care about me? While I can’t explain such pain, I also can’t explain God’s favor.

In August 1979, God extended His favor, and I was left to ask, God, why do You care so much about me? 

A few days before my senior year, I was daydreaming about my girlfriend and upcoming two-a-day football practices. Life was good. Really good . . . until three seconds of terror changed everything.

3 seconds of terror

While stacking hay bales on a conveyor, I felt a tug. A spinning tractor shaft had snagged my jeans leg, twisted it into a knot, and started pulling me in. Instinctively, I pulled back as hard as I could from death or a mangled future. Then it happened. Miraculously, my jeans started ripping. Up my left leg. Across my waist. Down my right leg. I looked down and my jeans were gone. After those three seconds of terror, all that remained were bare legs, undershorts, and a belt holding nothing but tiny jeans fragments.

Dazed and trembling, I collapsed in stunned silence, listening to the dull hum of machinery that chugged along as if nothing happened. It was as if I’d been watching from above, powerless to change my fate. No one was around to turn off the tractor. No one could have heard me if I had screamed. Only God could have ripped away those jeans. After coming to myself, all I could do was sit there and ask, God, why do You care so much about me?

3 tough steps that transform your family

The miracle of those three seconds transformed my kids born a decade later because it transformed me. I no longer have to understand God to know He cares – in good times and bad. In the four decades that followed, I’ve found no easy formula, just three tough steps I can take to transform my family, especially when life doesn’t make sense.

  1. Trust

Too often, our trust is limited to what we understand and know. But we’ll never understand much of life, so we must do first what we want to do last – trust that God has a plan for each of us. Anyone can trust because anyone can choose (Ps. 13:5, 37:5, and 56:3-4, and Prov. 3:5-6).

The old hymn says, “Trust and obey, for there’s no other way to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.” As a child, I dismissed these lyrics as simplistic, but I later clung to their truth when my newborn nearly died, my job dissolved, my mentor disappointed, and my father-in-law’s dementia disabled. Amidst life’s disappointments, we’re learning to trust that God truly cares.

  1. Transcend

Since trust can feel abstract at times, we need the practical second step of transformation – transcend. To transcend is to go beyond the abstract. And where is real transcendence found? In real hope. Hope rises above today’s triumph or tragedy. Hope seeks (not demands) clarity on how we can align with God’s plan for us. Hope brings peace when life is anything but peaceful.

Hope isn’t a wish, it’s Christ in us, the hope of glory (Col. 1:27). Hope knows God has called us to the riches of His glorious inheritance (Eph. 1:18). Hope unswervingly professes that God is faithful and a promise keeper (Heb. 10:23, 11:11). Even when weary and faint, hope renews our strength and soars on wings like eagles (Is. 40:31). Hope claims God’s plan to prosper, not harm, us (Jer. 29:11). Hope isn’t a strategy; it’s a choice we make to realize that God truly cares.

  1. Testify

After tasting a great dish at a restaurant, what do we do? We tell others. We see and smell reminders throughout the day. We find excuses to return, believing today’s experience will be even better than last time. So too with God.

Once we’ve tasted God’s goodness, seen His favor, and felt His care, there’s no going back. We have to tell others. Everything reminds us of Him. We do what others need most from us – testify. To testify is to serve as evidence of something’s existence. As Christians, we’re all evidence that God exists and has a plan for us, no matter what life throws our way (Matt 10:32, I Pet 3:15, Rom 10:9, Acts 1:8). Our lives are like the old children’s song: “Hide it under a bushel? NO! I’m gonna let it shine.”

Trust and obey. Transcend and hope. Testify and shine. If you’ll let this truth transform you, you’ll prepare your family to be transformed too . . . whether they’re facing tragedy or living on a mountain top. Then they’ll believe one thing:  God truly cares.

Questions: How have you seen God’s care in good times and bad? How could you help your family trust, transcend, and testify that God has a purpose to accomplish through them?