Humility is a prize pursued, not a prize possessed.

“Yea, me!” My toddler daughter loved shouting those two words. Incredibly cute for toddlers, but not so cute for adults. As adults, self-absorption and selfishness don’t get better; they just get subtler. We may not say, “Yea, me,” but we act like it. We demand rights, insist we deserve what we don’t earn, and act entitled.

In today’s world, it’s easy to feel entitled. For example, have you watched daytime TV lately? “Get what you deserve.” “You’re entitled.” “You deserve it.” Romans 6:23, though, says we deserve death; still, God offers us eternal life. And the gateway to enjoying the joy that comes with this eternal life is experiencing one of God’s favorite qualities: unentitled – the humility of character.

Unentitled:  The humility of character

Some people think entitlement is new to millennials. Nope. It goes all the way back to the Garden of Eden. Eve’s temptation wasn’t about eating fruit; it was about entitlement – that she should be able to be like God (Gen. 3:4-5). Then again, entitlements starts stealthily, like sin. Humility, though, starts with bold action – searching out entitlement and rejecting it, not rationalizing it.

Many parents rationalize poor choices and assume no consequences. But you’ll likely see your selfishness and pride in your kids because it’s harder to swallow your pride than to swallow the pill of entitlement. Thankfully, there’s a better pill . . . a cure that acts like an emotional and spiritual version of Pepto Bismol by coating and soothing your spirit – the pill of humility.

If you ever achieve humility, you’ve lost it. But the pursuit of humility is a beautiful journey with a bountiful harvest. It the fruit of countless un’s . . . Unassuming. Unselfish. Unwavering. Uncompromising. Undaunted. Unafraid. It may even seem unbelievable at first, but God’s family knows it’s an unbroken promise of unimaginable peace.

Humble-conviction

Humility by itself, though, isn’t enough. We need “humble-conviction” – humility balanced with conviction. If your humility exceeds your conviction, you’re aiming too low and not fulfilling your God-given potential. And if the opposite is true – your conviction outstrips your humility – you’re presumptive or cocky. Either way, you’re unfaithful and missing the mark.

The key to faithful kids is faithful parents who hit the mark. Your kids need you to model both ethics and work ethic, not complacency and coddling. Inclusive, without fake tolerance. True humility is not weakness; it’s meekness – strength under control. And Jesus loves meekness so much, He said: “Bless are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth” (Matt. 5:5).

God’s love of humility is clear. “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble” (1 Peter 5:5). “Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted” (Matt. 23:12). “Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven” (Matt. 18:4). “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves” (Phil. 2:3).

Another fact is also clear about humility – it’s easier to pass it down if you’ve seen it. Because my dad is the most humble, giving man I known, it’s easier to pass down humility to my kids. Easy? No. But easier because my dad’s unentitled spirit is so inspiring, as is my mom’s. It’s not a trophy; it’s a witness and an opportunity to bless. It’s a prayer with God’s favor, not a path for our favorites.

Although we prepare for God’s blessing, we can’t feel entitled to it. Although God owes us nothing, He gives us eternal life that’s neither earned nor deserved (Eph. 2:8-9). And although we’re entitled to the penalty of sins, God forgives us and cleanses us from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9).

And what does God ask in return? To replace “Yea, me” with “Yea, Thee” . . . to humbly kneel before Him. For when we kneel low on earth, we stand tall in heaven.

And that’s the ultimate gift you can give your kids – a prize that can be both pursued and possessed.

What’s your “U” character quality?

Here are “U” character qualities in choosing your Secret Sauce of A-to-Z character qualities: Unafraid, Unassuming, Unconventional, Undaunted, Understanding, Understated, Unentitled, Unintimidated, Unique, Unrelenting, Unselfish, Unwavering, Upright, or something else. Click here for a Free Printable Workbook, instructions, and 300 sample A-to-Z character qualities.

Questions: How would your kids describe your humility? What “U” word captures the essence of the character you want for your family, and why?